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Scenic Route
Life's one helluva ride — why not enjoy the view?
The Scenic Route Podcast is your audio chill pill, serving up mindset shifts, laughs, and 'aha!' moments that fuel your soul and your wallet.
We're all about:
- Finding purpose (without the fluff)
- Embracing the soft life (because hustle culture is so last season)
- Real talk (sugar-coating? Not around here)
- Actionable insights (for when you're ready)
- Daring convos (we go there, babes)
- Building resilience (without the toxic positivity)
- Mindfulness for real people (with real problems)
Whether you're feeling lost and emotionally exhausted, hiding from your kids in the bathroom, need a break from the chaos, or want to zen out, we've got you covered.
Join Jennifer Walter, sociologist (MASoc UCC) and pathfinder, on this journey to inner peace — with a generous side of potty humour.
Ready to care less about others' BS and more about your own bliss? Hop on The Scenic Route. Trust us, the view up here is *chef's kiss*.
New episodes drop every Tuesday.
Your next chill session awaits. You coming?
Scenic Route
The Productivity Myth: Courageous Insights to Thrive Without the Hustle feat. Elise Enriquez
Ready to shatter the productivity myth and reclaim your life? AND say Arrivederci to Hustle Culture – for good!
Join us for a transformative conversation with productivity coach Elise Enriquez as we courageously challenge the hustle culture mindset – and why we both hate the "you have the same 24 hours as Beyonce" meme. In this eye-opening episode, we explore a revolutionary approach to productivity that prioritizes meaningful progress over relentless doing.
Discover:
- Bold strategies to break free from societal expectations and 'Pinterest perfect' pressures
- Courageous ways to set boundaries and realistic goals without guilt
- Inspiring insights on staying present in both your personal and professional life
- How to use your visual senses in this really neat tactic to write better to-do lists
Elise shares her expertise on:
- Navigating the emotional landmines of shame and guilt in productivity
- Embracing authenticity and personal growth in a hustle-obsessed world
- Setting and defending your boundaries
- The surprising connection between productivity, spirituality, and feeling good
This isn't just another productivity hack – it's a brave new perspective on thriving in life and work. We dive deep into reclaiming your time, energy, and joy, offering actionable steps towards a more fulfilling existence.
Tune in to gain the courage to prioritize what truly matters and embark on your own scenic route to success. It's time to redefine productivity and embrace a life of authentic accomplishment and joy!
Connect with Elise Enriquez
Website
Instagram
LinkedIn
Listen to her podcast, The Productivity Shift
What’s Your Productivity Personality?
Take this 2-minute quiz to uncover your strengths (and snags) on the way to getting sh*t done—so you can accomplish your goals AND enjoy the journey.
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Desire to find your Scenic Route? Visit jenniferwalter.me — a welcoming space for the emotionally exhausted to rest, discover, and playfully embrace inner peace. Embrace a softer, more fulfilling life today!
For snapshots from Jennifer's scenic route to a softer life come over to
PICK YOUR SCENIC ROUTE AFFIRMATION
Ready to embrace your Scenic Route? Step off the beaten path with the Scenic Route Affirmation Card Deck. It's not about the hustle; it's about finding the courage to trust your inner compass and carve a path that's authentically yours.
Tap into your inner wisdom and let it guide you.
👉 Discover Your Scenic Route Affirmation Card
Curious about what insights await you today? Dive in and let your scenic journey unfold, one affirmation at a time.
SHOW SOME LOVE
If you found value in today's episode, I would appreciate it if you could leave a rating and review and help me share the soft life message.
If the word productivity makes your skin crawl, you're in the right place. My guest Elise and I, we're going to share a fresh perspective on productivity and on practical strategies for reclaiming your time, energy and joy. So if you're tired of feeling constantly overwhelmed, distracted and behind in life, get ready to rethink everything you thought you knew about being productive. Rethink everything you thought you knew about being productive. Hi and welcome to the Scenic Rooute Podcast, where we believe in embracing life's journey with purpose, curiosity and a bit of potty humor. I'm Zon Cool Mom and I'm always looking out for that perfect slice of gluten-free rhubarb pie. Every week, I get the joy of sitting down with dreamers and doers who dare to take the road less traveled in pursuit of their own magic. Together, we dive into the inspiring stories of soulful entrepreneurs and visionary leaders who boldly share their beliefs, lessons and fuck-ups. Excited, so am I. You're exactly where you're meant to be, and now let's take this conversation off the beaten track. Let's take this conversation off the beaten track.
Jennifer Walter:Elise Enriquez is a productivity coach who helps business owners and their teams make a shift from overwhelm to taking back control of their time. Elise is your guide for discovering and doing what matters most, so you and your team can progress to your next achievement and enjoy the ride along the way. She takes her experience in the operational world of corporate America, the entrepreneurial world of real estate and the transformational world of coaching to help you get your shit together so you can move forward with what matters most. Hi Elise, welcome to the Scenic Route.
Elise Enriquez :Podcast. Thanks for having me. I'm so glad to be here.
Jennifer Walter:Oh, me too. Like, especially, especially. Oh, we have such a load of topic today like productivity as a whole. It's like there is no shortage of like hacks and tools and books and what now? Advice and I'm sure we're we're not gonna do of those or maybe like a little hack, maybe your best one.
Elise Enriquez :If something comes up, yeah, if something comes up, we can do it, we're going to root off the things and like what it really means.
Jennifer Walter:So if you're listening now and you're like tired of feeling constantly overwhelmed, distracted or worse, constantly overwhelmed, distracted or worse, feeling like you're behind in life or have read that cheesy pinterest instagram quote, you have the same 24 hours as beyonce too many times you're in the right place you've got me nailed, you totally, you totally have me down Like oh my gosh, you totally get me.
Jennifer Walter:So I think, before we dive in, we need to kind of like talk about productivity, like what we mean, or what do you mean, like, can you explain how you define productivity? What do you mean when people, or when people come to you and they're like, oh, I need to be more productive?
Elise Enriquez :yeah, yeah, I think a lot of times when they're doing that, thinking like I need to get more done, you know, with the time that I have and, like you said, the Beyonce meme is like so true, I think that captures the cultural, like zeitgeist and productivity in general, and I think that if we were to, somebody was talking about like Venn diagrams and how sometimes it's just overlapping circles, I mean like completely it's just one circle sometimes. And I think that's what's dangerous about the word productivity is that I think it's been it kind of overlaps with hustle culture, like the word itself and how people have talked about it in the past, that it's about getting more done, and I even used to use that phrase get more done. But what I meant was and it took me a while to realize it get more of what matters done and that there's a difference between just getting more done and thinking about what really matters to me and how can I make progress on those things with the time that I actually have, like being realistic about the time I have and the energy I have during those times, the times that are available to me, right? So the definition I use in all the work that I do with folks is that productivity is making progress in what matters most to you, while still remaining present to the people, experiences and opportunities that are all around you.
Elise Enriquez :Because with that hustle culture, mentality, with the let's just get more stuff done mentality, all of that, we can be going after some really amazing goals but also lose touch with, like, the joy of our life or with the relationships that matter personally and professionally, and we can kind of be so nose to the grindstone that we're also missing opportunities that we might wanna act on. And so it's really kind of be so nose to the grindstone that we're also missing opportunities that we might want to act on. And so it's really kind of breaking out of that old mold and making a shift to saying, okay, but what matters most to me, and pausing to reflect on that from time to time so that you can use your time in a way that makes you feel good at the end of the day and even, if I dare say, like at the end of your life.
Jennifer Walter:Yeah, I love how you reframed it to like it's progress yourself. So, yes, it's dreams the vision you just had. Yeah, you got you. You understand me when you said like we gotta have the fun in it because like yeah, I don't know if it's double gemini in my zodiac or if it's enneagram 7 or whatever. Like, if it ain't fun, I'm out, like I can't, like I'm at this point where I'm like no, so you're so right, it's. There's such a toxic. We have reached such a toxic level of productivity and hustle culture.
Speaker 3:And it's like a message Whenever we're not living up to my higher self, my soul the expectations we set ourselves or that have been set for us. There's such a big amount of shame, but I mean that comes with it. I'm like you are at in the. I see, I mean I I had experiences myself and I see it in my clients.
Jennifer Walter:So sometimes it comes off like, oh, but I should be further ahead, or why can I not get this done? Or just kind of like all so much shame and guilt around those topics and I'm like this is not gonna get us anywhere well and I think that shame and guilt it's.
Elise Enriquez :It's bred into us, Not bred into us, it's nurtured into us. I guess you could say, if that's the right word, you know in all of our upbringings. Like you know, I was born and raised in the US as a seemingly white woman. I'm actually half Mexican, but I pass.
Jennifer Walter:You're white passing, you will.
Elise Enriquez :I'm white passing, I'm also straight passing. I was married to a man for a long time. I'm now married to a woman, so I've shaken all sorts of things up, but but there, but even with that, with all the passing, I'm able to do those expectations are there, right Of all these boxes we're supposed to check all throughout our lives, and of course, it can all be stated with, like you know, the the Pinterest perfect moms out there, are the ones who feel like they have to be Pinterest perfect moms out there, or the ones who feel like they have to be Pinterest perfect and all that kind of stuff. And so there's that that infiltrates, like what we think we're supposed to care about.
Elise Enriquez :And then there's also just the lack of reality that we have and me included, I have to work on this all the time about how much time we actually have and the energy we have in that time. So so I'm, I'm we're, we're edging very close to like a tactic here, but not a tip, but like when people, when, when people really start looking at the reality of their time, they start to realize there's no way they could get everything done that they have on their list, and so when people have that can whip out. That Beyonce meme is like we all have the same 24 hours and look how much this person is doing. Oh my gosh, there's so much privilege in some of those things.
Jennifer Walter:Right there's so there's so many. I mean she has a private stuff and whatever theory to support her.
Elise Enriquez :So so many things that intersect with that, and so it's. It's really about like, how much time do you have? How much time do you you have and what matters most in that time? Because are you working full-time and raising kids and taking care of pets and parents and all that kind of stuff? And even if you're not, even if you're, you know, heaven forbid a, you know, a childless cat mom, as everybody seems to be talking about right now the cat.
Jennifer Walter:Heaven forbid, yeah, heaven forbid.
Speaker 3:Like shame on you how dare you the worst?
Elise Enriquez :yes how dare you not have children and stuff, whatever, but like it doesn't, it doesn't matter what's going on in your life. It's like how much time and energy do you really have and how are you going to use it?
Speaker 3:you get to decide. That is where I think it's also so so wonderful that you highlight the energy part again and again right because and we all know the hero's journey, at least when we were kids.
Jennifer Walter:Time it's like this is to fly by when we're having fun and still don't like.
Speaker 3:Right like einstein, time is relative whatever I'm not not a physicist, but like it's so true right and this is this whole mumbo jumbo of like time banding and quantum under the hood of the car as I like to say right, it's basically you're having fun, you can't do it on your own. Why time? Because who's at the door. You're more productive. Time flies, you get more, you know you just get more done too.
Elise Enriquez :It's our ego when you're like our conscious mind it's just right.
Speaker 3:So it is an aspect interesting, how it is the gatekeeper, yeah, how that can be shaped, are you right? And it's he said, he's the meanest bouncer in all the world.
Jennifer Walter:How he's you have to. Yes, I call him a bouncer too. It's not really just about getting more things done and just kind of like crossing random shit off your to-do list but things that matter most to you, because that's familiar. That's how can people get clarity on their true priorities.
Elise Enriquez :Yeah, I, I'm someone who had to work at this, which is, of course, why I work with people on it right like I feel like we take care of our own stuff and like, oh, I can help other people with that now like I have figured that out, luckily, yeah, and so I was the queen of checking things off a list, as like that was almost my version of numbing out Right.
Speaker 3:Like oh interesting.
Elise Enriquez :Yeah. I was like oh, product, really quick, you know, quote, unquote productivity, like that kind of productivity was like that was like my numb out mode, like, oh, I got a bunch, bunch of stuff done, but that didn't mean that it mattered.
Elise Enriquez :so I was like I got a bunch of stuff done, but I didn't feel any better to me it was like um, it was almost like artificial sugar, like if you're gonna have sugar, just have sugar, you know, unless of course you've got health issues but like, like, go for the real sugar at least.
Jennifer Walter:Like, don't, don't go for like the light version into your brain anyway.
Elise Enriquez :So might as well, yeah, might as might as well get the good stuff and cut the chemicals right, but I was like getting like this fake high and a quick you know, dopamine hit of like cross, yeah, check, check, check. But it was like stuff that I didn't care about. It was stuff for other people I didn't include, like what was what I wanted and what was for me. So I had all these systems in place, but I didn't actually look at like what was on my to do list, like what is really there.
Jennifer Walter:And do.
Elise Enriquez :I really care about those things, and so to some extent, having like tools and systems in place is really helpful, because it puts everything in front of you that you've agreed to and that you think you want right. So it's like it's getting it all just in one place. So I I'm always like get it, just get it all in one place, like don't let it be scattered everywhere, get it all in one place, because when you get it in one place you can make choices right, because you the um the way I think about it is, you can't prioritize I would what's not known.
Elise Enriquez :I would have a mysterious illness and we tend to kind of have things scattered right around either the either because we don't have systems or because there's just stuff in our head that we're not letting ourselves say or put down about like what we want. There's things that are always on our minds that we don't get out of our heads.
Speaker 3:So when we put it all in one place, we can start to go oh yeah, like the podcast, like I haven't like done something with that in a while or whatever.
Elise Enriquez :It might be right Like, oh yeah that the trip that I keep saying I want to take, I wanted to read books.
Speaker 3:It's a form of resistance.
Elise Enriquez :Yeah, or I'm like I haven't had my mammogram or whatever it could like it can be all those things that are like on our minds that we don't let ourselves get off our minds and put in front of us, and sometimes just doing that makes it really clear about whether or not we want to make progress on them or not? Yes, I'm just like, oh yeah, wait, never mind.
Elise Enriquez :Like when I look at it compared with everything else, like that's not anything I actually care about, and then other times it's kind of like an interesting, it's like this, like long neglected thing that needs to get dusted off and put in front of us, and now we can put it up against everything else and go when I don't know.
Jennifer Walter:Do I, do I?
Speaker 3:do I do? I want to make progress on that thing like what? Would that look like? Just to take one little step and see how that feels?
Elise Enriquez :like instead of just perseverating on it slow you down, exactly, body doesn't feel safe when everything is going too well, so you might just just remember give a big look.
Speaker 3:I don't know one or two things that you kind of like feel safe across from the list that you're not gonna yeah, and that you're not doing anymore and it's like you've done before to kind of like numb out by checking boxes, not about yeah, I mean it was.
Elise Enriquez :Sometimes it was like I was adding things I already did, right, like I think there's a lot of us if anybody else is a list maker you know like you add things that you already did, so you can cross it off. So there's those kinds of things, but it's also kind of just like is is it really like essential that I'm doing? Like you'd be doing stuff for people that they didn't ask for.
Elise Enriquez :I was just like I think they need this. Like for my husband at the time, I would like do stuff that he didn't appreciate. I'm like why am I? Yes, which?
Jennifer Walter:why am I?
Elise Enriquez :doing this? Why don't we just have a conversation about what he might appreciate and how I can support him?
Jennifer Walter:Right. So there was a lot of like um like hustling to be wanted and needed and liked and all this kind of stuff or like things that I thought I should do Like.
Elise Enriquez :Oh, I should. I shouldn't host this thing. Like no, I shouldn't, I don't even want to host that thing. Like.
Jennifer Walter:I can just like send a gift, I don't like you know what I mean Like social media, just the things that you're just like why?
Elise Enriquez :Why am I doing?
Jennifer Walter:that Social media. So for me, like now, especially my business, I'm like social media is not really how I get clients. I have an Instagram account.
Elise Enriquez :I will share my podcast there to make sure everybody knows about new episodes. If I feel like posting, I will.
Jennifer Walter:But it's not part of like my actual marketing plan.
Elise Enriquez :Right Like doing this is more part of my marketing plan getting to talk with other people and have real authentic conversations. Yeah, it's way better. For me, this is way more enjoyable for me than to try to dream up a bunch of social media posts right, yeah, and so it's just the stuff we should feel like.
Jennifer Walter:I don't want to do that I don't want to do that anymore. Why is this on here? That's really. Yeah, I went through that also young version of shadow.
Elise Enriquez :It was really empowering too.
Jennifer Walter:We said okay we to be brutally honest, getting okay.
Elise Enriquez :Why look at our?
Speaker 3:shadows learn so much about ourselves.
Jennifer Walter:Why do I think I should? It's also like a tool. It was a lot of helps us understand parts of ourselves as well in fears and desires, like for for my family I'm like how can the shadow, or how can understanding our shadow self?
Speaker 3:I'm not even sure if this should be done years and desires like so they're, that's where they live. So imagine it's a pandora's box expected like or closet when you're good again with the mythology yes, school, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what the shadow is. If you want to get visual, I'm like I should have had a blackboard, so like if you start with piece of chocolate let's look at it okay, right like I mean. No, it was like my book club.
Jennifer Walter:We would every year do this cookie party and I would host.
Elise Enriquez :I hosted it every year for until I got divorced. I was like somebody needs to host it this year.
Speaker 3:I can't do it. So we look at the surface, and a couple of years ago I was like bake cookies for the cookie party.
Elise Enriquez :Like for the when I was no longer hosting it, cause I actually I like hosting stuff, but I was like bake cookies for the cookie party bake cookies for the cookie party.
Jennifer Walter:It's coming day and I'm just like you know what I'm going through a fricking divorce right now.
Speaker 3:I'm going to buy cookies or actually I'm going to show up empty handed. You're like I can do those things.
Elise Enriquez :And it was really funny because I showed up with like store-bought cookies and everybody was like whoa are you okay?
Jennifer Walter:And I'm like no, I'm not okay.
Elise Enriquez :Divorce sucks, especially during the holidays.
Speaker 3:So here's your fricking store-bought cookies that I grabbed on my way. So the more conscious we become, the more we integrate.
Elise Enriquez :Yeah and they were like we're so glad you're here right, you know it's like, but they just were like so used to be doing this other thing, that they're like hi, you, okay, I'm like. No, do I look?
Jennifer Walter:okay, I'm not okay, rejected fears or about ourselves you know if I identify as an introvert, for example, I also stopped what's the opposite of that. It's being extroverted, so that's repressed. That goes in pandora's box.
Speaker 3:That's below the surface, happens is my soul will keep putting me in situations because I'm like no, no, no I'm an introvert.
Jennifer Walter:I'm an introvert yeah, it was really interesting, right, because that's repressed everyone was like. So taken, the mind is always wanting to bring what is repressed and rejected or denied. What now? And it was really? Like almost kind of it's wanting to, it's wanting to show us hey, I want to be healed. Healed means to become right until I said no, you know what, I actually have enough.
Elise Enriquez :So I want yeah.
Jennifer Walter:Yeah, we're not in the business of and it's really yeah, it's really tough so like.
Speaker 3:So it's like really tough. You know these bad situations conversations that we were talking about strange. All of these situations are showing them. Or if we have conflicts, that's not good at all conflicts.
Elise Enriquez :Well, I mean that I think that is a thing. I think I think traditions are a thing, they're a thing that like get in the way of like what we really want.
Speaker 3:And it's like we can create new traditions, we can shift them a little bit Like we went from always having Christmas in the Eastern part of our state.
Jennifer Walter:I live in Washington state and the majority of you know, the elders lived over there, so we would go over there for Christmas and Thanksgiving and stuff.
Elise Enriquez :And at some point my aunt just couldn't host anymore. Right, Are we really going to make her keep hosting when you know she's like she seriously had her, a part of her, a partial leg amputation, Like we're really going to make her host? No, we're not going to make her host.
Speaker 3:We got it and everybody got that, but like at the same time it required it took a major life event or two or whatever to allow it and, uh, you know, inherited, I guess, grown up, your unconscious mind, your ego and elderly woman like somebody's, like it can be, like, yeah, like your kids don't have to come try to help.
Elise Enriquez :You put all this together.
Jennifer Walter:They're under strain too, like anything in order to keep me alive, and so I think I think sometimes it is like I'm getting everything in front of you is one thing, but then pausing on a regular basis to reflect, to be able to say, like, what went well this month, what didn't?
Elise Enriquez :go so well this month. What did I learn from?
Jennifer Walter:that.
Speaker 3:And who do I want to be next month?
Jennifer Walter:We're not talking at the task level.
Elise Enriquez :We're just like taking a pause every once in a while to remind ourselves like who do I want to be in this world?
Jennifer Walter:I think we talked about this when we first met.
Speaker 3:This whole idea of life is short and we don't, we don't know where it's gonna go and I don't know for sure, like no matter how spiritual you are, like I just don't know for sure like what comes after this life.
Elise Enriquez :It could be nothing it could be everything.
Jennifer Walter:I don't know. All I know is this one, so I want it to be good. It's not always gonna be happy, enjoyable. I don't know. All I know is this one, so I want it to be good. It's not always going to be happy, enjoyable. You also don't know what a future is going to do. What's happening next day? A coach will ask you to come up with an action, yeah.
Speaker 3:So it's like how do I want to be right now, how do I want to act, how do I want to show up, how do I want to feel?
Elise Enriquez :Now I'm using the introvert, extrovert, exactly, and that has a lot to do with how we're spending our time.
Speaker 3:Like, I think, james Clear talked about it Like the identity is your continued beingness, and it's like who are you being?
Elise Enriquez :That is your identity, so we get to choose our identity all the time, and it's always easy, because that means, like, how do we react to crappy stuff that goes on?
Speaker 3:And the ego is like whoa, whoa, whoa. We get to make so many choices, so many more choices than we allow ourselves to believe sometimes, because the choices can be really hard, because they can, like you said, lead to hard conversations and strained relationships and whatnot, but to me all of this is productivity right. All of this is like what matters most to me and how am I going to progress that?
Jennifer Walter:and it's freeing up time right, and it's stopping. It's wanting to stop. So most what most people do is protecting time. For what?
Speaker 3:matters most to you, they pull back because they the ego is right, they're like oh my god, I do.
Jennifer Walter:I look terrible I am not, you know, I don't know what's the topic of discussion.
Speaker 3:What do I say?
Jennifer Walter:what do I do? So they start buying into those stories and they pull back and they retract and then they go through their lives really staying split Like share with your clients on like, say, setting boundaries.
Speaker 3:And so then it's right around the life.
Elise Enriquez :It can be sometimes. I'll tell you what. No, my wife and I were just talking about this last night.
Speaker 3:She needed to set some some boundaries with one of her. She's a general contractor.
Jennifer Walter:And so being a queer female general contractor somewhat stereotypical, I suppose. Yeah, but also struggle in other ways because you're working largely with to be honest in our, at least in our space, a lot of straight white cisgender men, right, so it's just like, it's just different, and so, really, what has been most helpful for me about boundaries and what I talk about a lot with my community and my clients is that the boundaries are something that you do, that I can't expect you, the other person, to uphold my boundaries.
Speaker 3:I have to uphold my boundaries, and so with my wife yesterday, she had set a boundary in the past about who does what like, who does finish work versus you know lower skilled work and we had.
Jennifer Walter:She has some youngsters on the team and they're very. No, I don't but yeah, I mean, and the skilled people kept trying to have the youngsters do stuff they don't know how to do, and she had said it multiple times and it still was happening and she just was like you know had to have like a face-to-face coming back to that talk about it like for real. This cannot happen anymore, or else we cannot work together right like it's a hard conversation to have, but it was up to her to uphold the boundary.
Speaker 3:You can't state the boundary and expect everybody to take the action for you, you have to state the boundary, and you see how they respond, and then you up the boundary and you say no that's not okay no, I'm mind-blowing, and in my own life I didn't really know, and so it's not like most of us, there's not any quick or easy advice on.
Elise Enriquez :It is like getting sucked in.
Speaker 3:You have to be one. My god, if I feel this way, it's never gonna state boundaries that you're really going to uphold.
Elise Enriquez :Like just don't say it if you're not going to uphold it, because yeah, right around 90 seconds that really matter to you and that's the scientific, which is kind of like childbearing right.
Jennifer Walter:Like you can't sit, like it's like you got to choose your battle right that extends to like every relationship right, like you can't have like we want to win or we don't care about. Yeah, exactly so, like what's worth going to war for? Like and that I think that goes so back to like, what are your? Values like what do you really?
Speaker 3:care about what are the true violations and a lot of times people kind of think about uses very like fluffy like aspirational things, but it's like the way I say that is like, and so that's what pisses you off or excuse me values, you know what pisses you off?
Jennifer Walter:Because that's a values violation and when that's like to me, like people not returning their shopping cart when they're perfectly
Speaker 3:able-bodied that pisses me off when they don't return their shopping cart.
Elise Enriquez :And to me that's like you're not being thoughtful and that thoughtfulness and thoughtfulness of impact on others is really important to me, it's a value I hold dearly, and so I don't care if you're running late. Just put the shopping cart back. Don't leave it in the middle of the parking, which sounds so silly.
Jennifer Walter:But that was something where I was like, oh, it's actually who I am. What is this? Really about well, and so there, and it's not like I'm gonna go confront- somebody like that's not.
Speaker 3:That's not the war I'm trying to win, but it wants you to stay in your room how I expect other people to treat each other when they're going to be part of whatever it is. I have kept you alive, like I will speak up about stuff you want to cross the threshold, that's what?
Jennifer Walter:I'll just grab the shopping cart shopping carts because but imagine how limiting it?
Speaker 3:is. This is why so many people will have the same experiences, but don't also not like um and my I feel, also, not many people realize kind of like that.
Jennifer Walter:It says a lot about how you approach personal responsibility and consideration right like. That's what it means by unconscious, even if it's like people are unconscious. More than 90 percent of the world is unconscious, they're not even aware, they think that, oh, my life is supposed to be this way oh, I'm supposed to feel kind of empty and kind of unfocused.
Speaker 3:Your individual. You know, and this is what I'm saying, it's right around midlife and it's just like you, leaving it wherever, and I have.
Jennifer Walter:You know I had so many clients that achieved everything they set out to do in their lives.
Elise Enriquez :They're like I totally got married, yeah, yeah and it's like, but that's where we can see, like what are the?
Jennifer Walter:boundaries worth setting why so I'm not gonna approach a stranger about a shopping cart but I don't think something is you, sir, or? Yeah just let the shot. I was like no, come on like.
Elise Enriquez :What are you doing? Put that back, and she would be like I'm taking it back.
Jennifer Walter:I don't care, I'm taking it back.
Elise Enriquez :This is rude Right, she doesn't do it but like that's. I guess that's just like the example, Like you have to think about. Who am I setting the?
Speaker 3:boundaries with, and what are the things that really matter? I'm willing to have a hard conversation. What my wife has said about us is like we don't.
Elise Enriquez :We don't always get it right, but we do the right thing, even when it's a hard thing, like we get there eventually and sometimes it is having a hard conversation.
Speaker 3:We're not just the shadow. It's not like a lot of people, I think oh my god shadow work. That means, like you know, I'm gonna become a bitch, I'm gonna become all these things, these traits that I have you know avoided and that are socially not acceptable.
Elise Enriquez :Let's call it what it is right like mean, you don't want to be a bitch because you feel there are social precautions.
Speaker 3:Absolutely, or what? How to find what it means to be a bitch Right and so um. So that's not necessarily true. I mean cause part of it too is like she was kind of like a bachelor, a bachelorette, I guess the whole you know.
Jennifer Walter:For most of her life she was in relationships but always felt felt very independent, whereas I was always partnered up they're probably not and very quickly took on all the expectations of being like a suburban housewife
Jennifer Walter:you know kind of thing like where I was like and did all the things and you know energy he was like he was a breadwinner even though I had my own business as well, and like all this time, and it's there's- and so when she and I came, together, it was kind of easy for me to fall into my old ways and then be resentful when really I needed to have a conversation and be like dude, I'll do laundry, you do dishes Like I'm not. I can't do both.
Elise Enriquez :And she's like, oh my God, of course I'm like great, all right, we've got that now. And so if I do dishes, she's like babe that's my job.
Speaker 3:I'm waiting for food to heat up in the microwave, I can unload a dishwasher. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, it was just like. But just having someone has identified as being a mathematician the whole life, for example, they say, oh, I've never been creative. Yeah, it's probably in your shadow. So what are you going to do?
Speaker 3:And imagine how much more joy you know, or freedom, or creativity you can have even in your mathematics career, for example, if you incorporated a little bit more of that and it's freeing and that energy, um, that is repressed and that's our condition.
Jennifer Walter:So for everyone it can be trauma. It's a therapeutic word. I'm not a therapist, I call and years, but that is, in our energetic field, we're carrying it now so like why didn't you say something? Situations like attracts life, so we attract like more of those situations, so the more you release that energy, the more you integrate those repressed part of yourselves, that repressed emotional energy then you are lighter you are freer, you become healthier all of a sudden.
Speaker 3:You know my allergies started to heal certain certain issues, physical issues.
Elise Enriquez :I have started to see that I'm doing this now and it fucking pisses me off, and he lets me do this yeah, he's like totally chilling on the couch and I'm like quietly sending the shit out of him. Um, something's been there and done that very probably like the same. No, totally. I mean, I still do it like we all like.
Jennifer Walter:This is like I feel like I'm always learning, I'm always growing, I'm never gonna be done like I seriously had somebody tell me when I was going, when I was like I've been a coach for 15 years and I was it for me as well.
Speaker 3:That's how I got into this, and so they tell you to like that. It was a moment where, to your friends and family, to let them know you're going to become a coach, because then they'll know about your business. Right Types of careers, the same salary, the same boyfriends.
Jennifer Walter:It was like a friend of a friend that ran into a social event and she was just like, oh, I didn't get that letter, but I heard about it because I didn't have her address.
Elise Enriquez :I didn't know her.
Speaker 3:That's a hard realization.
Elise Enriquez :most people don't even reach that first it's just like, and that you must think you're perfect if you're going to help, you know, and that's okay. Yeah, it was like, oh, my god in order to transform your life.
Speaker 3:No, I was like I'm not shaming, blaming, I just like figuring it out and I like helping other people figure it out but this is another and I do. I think we're always figuring it out and we're never going to get it right all the time, which to me that's that's a major part of productivity, too, is like running experiments is like having a hypothesis
Speaker 3:autonomy complete something right not having this again, perseverating in your brain about something and thinking about all the reasons it's not going to work, everything in it. That's not a real experiment, right?
Jennifer Walter:that's just like that's how powerful you have a hypothesis about something you got to own or your business or whatever like, because you can then try it out a little bit and find out right, and so I think that sometimes we can get in like this automatic mode of okay, like you said, like just doing things anyone who's still around the house that nobody seems to appreciate and they're sitting on their ass or whatever, and it's like, or I could just not do it, or I could have a conversation about it or I could yeah, I could have a conversation with my partner.
Jennifer Walter:You know, what do you think about allocating some money to have somebody move along one.
Speaker 3:What do you think about allocating some money to having somebody? Clean for us, you know anyone who's just once in a while right.
Jennifer Walter:This first part is like like we get to like try something and the experiments can be something that are ongoing, or it can be just one conversation, whatever Right, and see where it goes.
Speaker 3:And it's funny how often I help people have conversations that judgment is caused by some emotional charge.
Elise Enriquez :I don have a strong reaction right in my mouth. I don't know what I said, but right a reaction. I can totally screw it up that is a telltale, you know uh attached.
Speaker 3:So if you have a judgment about somebody, you knew what you were judging about whether it's them with their employees, it doesn't mean you are in their personal life, it's just like, but it means that sounds like you need to have a conversation.
Jennifer Walter:You're not letting yourself that permission to be that thing we need to have more conversations, but you're assenting it if you see someone else living, that slack like all the ways that we can be you're not allowing your conditioning how you raise that sometimes their beliefs, you took on it's self-imposed right.
Speaker 3:Of course we're children, we don't know, we're just trying to survive, but those walls it's. You're hitting up against that wall, that boundary, and don't get me wrong and so that's one way another way is that yeah, I'm gonna make a phone call. I'm like I'm a conflict of you know with this generation usually when we have a conflict and both people are going at it.
Elise Enriquez :I'm not gonna pick it up, that is reflecting something, and then the business owner, like I should be a quote unquote. I should pick it up, right? If you don't want to work with me, and you call me we're not gonna another way is uh, really, and what we're? Attempting, so the results were attracting.
Jennifer Walter:So, for example, I whatever the same shit happening over and over again. My ex um had kept.
Speaker 3:This is really, I feel we have, unusual. This was an extreme case. He had like three accidents in one month a lot like either a car accident or somebody hit uh one of his cars in the parking lot or somebody hit one of his corporate like company vehicles and I was like wait a minute three times in one month.
Speaker 3:I'm like there's something going on here and I'm like so with that it's wanting to purge an emotion time. There's something you are repressing or not in yourself, so typically in that situation that would cause anger right running into this, or it might cause maybe it's kind of not a myth in a way.
Jennifer Walter:I wasn't. I mean, why not happen to me? I think people expect me to say you have as much time.
Speaker 3:You have time like you get to do whatever you want with your time, because which is true, you?
Elise Enriquez :do get to do whatever you want with your time, wait, wait, wait was it. We don't have time. No, no, no, not a car accident.
Speaker 3:You're right, no, no, no, you don't repetitive situation you don't have time to do it all.
Elise Enriquez :You only have this much time oh, let's talk about these commitments already that you are either willing to alter or you're committing to, and so here's how much time you have it was.
Jennifer Walter:What do you want to happen?
Elise Enriquez :because what I see, and I'm not kidding like I will, somebody will, because I see people's calendars I see their to-do list.
Jennifer Walter:I see all the shit right so I will see somebody in back-to-back meetings all day long like seriously not a break.
Elise Enriquez :I'm like when do you pee when?
Jennifer Walter:do you eat right?
Elise Enriquez :back-to-back meetings all day long, and then 20.
Jennifer Walter:I went into their to-do list, one of which is like writing a proposal. It's going to take more than an hour.
Elise Enriquez :I'm just like in what world do you think you have time today?
Jennifer Walter:I don't do well with your email bosses back-to-back.
Elise Enriquez :You think you have time today to do 20 things.
Jennifer Walter:I don't do well with female bosses Back to back. You don't have time for any biological support for yourself. I always had the kind of thing where they were like In what world do?
Elise Enriquez :you think this happens, and so that's where it's like you're right.
Jennifer Walter:I mean Meryl Streep in the Devil Wears Prada With how you're doing things right now.
Elise Enriquez :You don't have time. Looks like the nice. It's that, and so that's to me about having like these systems in place that you can say, and not just the systems like to me. I think of systems as like there's the apps, but there's also how do I engage with these things.
Jennifer Walter:How do I put?
Elise Enriquez :things in front of me in a way where I'm making choices and then I feel good about what's not getting done so that you can say, yeah, I don't have time and therefore I'm not doing these things. And I made that a conscious choice. And now, instead of just feeling like crap at the end of the day because all 20 things didn't get done, I see some things emerging, but that was um.
Jennifer Walter:Yeah, that was really a tough pill also because I'm like yes, I'm a feminist, yes, like go women in power, like leadership positions out of commitment and your persona. That's the identity you took on for your whole life, yeah, and then, like you're screwing me over possible and then to like have this resentment towards women at the same time. That's in your shadow get out of this commitment if you and then they keep showing up in our bosses.
Speaker 3:We project it, so that's how it shows up. That's what I mean by whatever we repress. I mean, I forgot the very important part. That's one way that the shadow, yeah, like yeah, are you going to be?
Elise Enriquez :like to, the ego does not want us to discover our shadow.
Jennifer Walter:What does that look like and what does that mean?
Elise Enriquez :for your time and stop expecting especially at different stages of so it's projecting what we have repressed. Stop expecting so much of yourself right now, right like or, in your case, if you want to be that present like if you want to be our caregivers, you know, however, you want to be that kind of like if you want to be, you know how are you want to be that kind of experience that we have with the world right.
Jennifer Walter:Yes, yeah, so the female represents the reality of your time and how do you feel about other things?
Elise Enriquez :The mother becomes our internalized mother, the internalized voice that we have towards ourselves.
Jennifer Walter:So whatever relationship we have, with our mother, becomes a parent to our inner toddler. Family right like, and it prioritizes. Our kids, our relationship are we like a family that prioritizes our family they prioritize their family, which means they make decisions about not doing things, sometimes like we're both just how we interact with. See if collaboration community with skipping physical practice, physical world, everything physical money because they're there's people think that money is so much cultural pressure money material parents to have their physical world.
Speaker 3:It's like it's okay like our perception of the physical world and you don't want to let people down show up with it and how we engage with it to everything and it's okay until we do shadow to say no. I think what's hard about our relationship the time thing is that people? Try to make changes to like how they're doing things. Remember it's just is dictated by our relationship with our mother and how we perceived it and how we internalized it. Remember, it's just the perception.
Elise Enriquez :Because you've already made these commitments At toddler ages.
Speaker 3:we're just seeing the world and we're going based on what feels good, what doesn't feel good, what feels safe, what's unsafe.
Elise Enriquez :So we observe.
Speaker 3:Yeah, because we can take a couple weeks, because a lot of your mother on your calendar, for example, phone rings. She leaves the room so I had a client to get the phone. We think, oh my god my mother is leaving me forever.
Elise Enriquez :So this is a team member. You know what I mean? Yeah, everything that happens when your child wasn't getting his time. I can't trust the clients you know I can't trust the client right, she's gonna leave me, and so there begins our condition right, and so we grow up. Just, I'm like unconscious to that dynamic that exists in us, you know, like not healthy, and we project it out into the world. But it's beautiful because we are meant to pivot, we are meant to forget.
Speaker 3:Therefore, you're never logging who we are. We are meant to have these experiences and to go through this process of becoming split and then full again. It's like at a restaurant that's the grand human experiment, the openings.
Elise Enriquez :Shift is going to be so.
Speaker 3:It's why right.
Jennifer Walter:So it's like you got to do the closing, nothing wrong you're right in this case, like you are the right shift, it's all, it's all, perfect. Yeah, you are the next shift, so you're next, not the p.
Speaker 3:you got that exactly as it should, even the person who keeps having the same experiences with bosses like yourself.
Jennifer Walter:Yeah, future, you is going to be pissed at you if you don't give yourself time to take care of yourself to send the recap and to log your hours To change that dynamic.
Speaker 3:That's all he did, was just add a little buffer time between meetings and then typically. Another thing is people's relationships with their parents heal, but it took weeks for that because they're healing it internally and we project it so when it heals and booked and I was like that's. Then we project a healthier model and dynamic and for at least a couple weeks we all need. You're gonna have to work longer hours once you start owning your shit and the hours long boundaries become expectations with your boss.
Jennifer Walter:Uh naturally and that's okay, you're, you're non-negotiable. There's something you don't even talk about, because they're just there whatever they need to be around when you start owning your side of the street.
Speaker 3:If it's no longer blaming other people or saying, no, it's that person right, then other people can only respond he's getting deprived or they fall away to survive all the time right and so our, then our, relationship with our father it takes time um for like new boundaries our dynamic with our father, these experiments. It takes time for things to shake out, so it's like you've got to be patient the shadow stick to it
Speaker 3:and then, make adjustments, but you usually aren't going to scrap the thing all together like never mind, I'm not going to have any our spirituality anymore never mind, I'm just going to be booked all the time right.
Jennifer Walter:Never mind, I'm gonna expect too much of myself for the rest of my life. So um yeah, oh, it's deep stuff, it's fun yeah I mean you blew my mind before when you said the perception of the physical world is dictated by our relationship with our mother I'm like it's the same when you're I don't know. Okay, so, oh my gosh and uh.
Elise Enriquez :So our relationship with our father is the relation is kind of like how we have we perceive spirituality um non-physical something like a quick win.
Jennifer Walter:Yeah, think of like.
Elise Enriquez :No, yeah, think of like I know I'd be, loving father, right, yeah, I know, I know loving father, then you feel. That's why I want to, like you feel safe, you feel secure, you feel provided for the productivity shift is like emotionally, I call my spiritually and then you don't think that's exactly that brings true for anyone who has boomer parents. But that's how it works, like I know well.
Speaker 3:Again, like I said we were meant to be conditioned. Trust me, I know that generation yeah.
Elise Enriquez :And they, they went through their shit. I'm not Yep. They went through their shit, they went absolutely 100% through their shit and their identities. And they were like you know, we're not going to do work. And so even with my, I originally had a chill. It's this six week, six week, and so, uh, no, what I'm describing is the ideal. It's like, yeah, they could learn all that six weeks.
Speaker 3:I can teach it to them and like and so I take, I take my clients through a visualization process when they are doing this and your dreams with the masculine so that becomes as women, these systems in place, because you're like, oh, I'm actually going to pursue this right.
Elise Enriquez :Like all these things start and there's a shadow side.
Speaker 3:So it's like everything's going to be changing. So you're constantly going to be adapting dynamic, changing how you're doing your boundaries and changing how you're doing your. The relationship that we've got to stay in it to have isn't like this, isn't a one of the first man, our father, like you can, if any relationship many people your weight loss, but is it going to last? That is it going to be internalized and we carry that. We assume it to be true. And then we project that.
Elise Enriquez :I've never going to measure or count or weigh anything ever again. I absolutely refuse. I'm done with it and we'll see where my body goes.
Speaker 3:but I'm done.
Elise Enriquez :I'm done, we can take our power back and we can evolve the inner man, I, and make him divine or make him ideal, but I am done and it's it's deep because it wasn't sustainable.
Speaker 3:It's not just about feel good, it was a complete external man.
Elise Enriquez :It's about healing when I'm having to stick it out right with any of my experiments that I'm running, so I suppose I am making progress for you.
Jennifer Walter:Progress on right, it's like to me it's worth it, but that doesn't mean you don't take breaks from it. That doesn't mean that you're like went asleep with to-do list for the rest of your life. Changed massively, massively. Yeah what?
Speaker 3:matters. And it's funny because um and I had resistance, we were talking about resistance, I had resistance as a coach, to me like the to-do list incorporating so and that was shaped by my conditioning. So it all comes back to our conditioning. What is our perception of spirituality, religion, you know, whatever it is.
Elise Enriquez :My as an Iranian American, my family, fled.
Speaker 3:What became the?
Elise Enriquez :Islamic regime right.
Jennifer Walter:It led this idea of.
Speaker 3:Islam for a better life life right.
Elise Enriquez :So I grew up in a very secular household most iranians that you meet in right it's like it's not the diaspora who have left right like it's okay, um they are pretty secular for that reason, because they knew they were like this is not compatible with our values.
Jennifer Walter:We're not like there's a difference.
Speaker 3:We're c to sign reading signs no and your system can hold both and it's just showing you both choices no, I don't want to say with a negative view but, that was my takeaway.
Elise Enriquez :It's like overly, overly critical this is what my past self.
Jennifer Walter:Just thought I wanted and just cannot trust it and anyone is religious has an agenda.
Speaker 3:What am I gonna not? It's funny because now on the other side I can say well, I probably knew, I knew I, I knew, I knew, my gut knew, because religion has been exploited.
Jennifer Walter:But this is not about religion.
Speaker 3:But that colored my Religion doesn't have an agenda.
Elise Enriquez :It's people who bring it into, and then misuse it, misguided as you are about, and so that colored my connection with God or connection with the creator or source, or the choice energy. It doesn't have to be scattered.
Speaker 3:You don't have to it's not the bearded man in the sky. It's just, it's the unseen, it's the unseen force that lives within us, and so, um that is the resistance that I had was uh, I did not want to incorporate spirituality into my work. I didn't want to be public about it.
Elise Enriquez :I don't want to talk about it.
Speaker 3:My own perceptions of you know a coach, I didn't want to be like woo-woo and spiritual and like not be taken seriously about this. You know energetic force that lives in all of us. It was only when I healed, you know, my inner masculine, that things also started to change externally as well as and I started to own my own spirituality and own it and figure out how I wanted to show it and how I wanted to express it.
Jennifer Walter:And pass it on in conversations and coaching.
Speaker 3:Right, and it's funny because the word, the idea of being spiritual, never even crossed my mind. I didn't even see myself as spiritual, but I would have friends and family, like, oh, you're just so spiritual like I am.
Speaker 3:Like, to me it was just nature, like it's just like to connect, to meditate, to have steam yeah, sometimes is it's part of being on this planet, it's part of staying rooted, it's. It didn't mean that I was like praying every night, you know, on the foot of my bed, or I just had this idea of, like, what it meant to be spiritual. It meant that you had to be conforming to a religion, or you had to be praying to something specific, or and it's not, it's just, it's just this unseen energy. And then I started doing energy work as well, which is very spiritual, and I, you know, a few years ago, if I would have ever been doing something like that, I'd be like you're out of your mind. That's crazy, you know, but it's owning that part of myself that I had repressed big, monumental passes ahead of us that.
Jennifer Walter:That reminds me of when I first. How do you uh, when I was also my journey and trying different things? Checking tasks and I was like what's what's your take, what's your tip?
Elise Enriquez :this yeah, and I heard about sound healing.
Jennifer Walter:It does come back to this shit sounds weird like again getting close to a hack again just some stupid chick banging on a ball right to take one is that you take it one step at a time, like no matter what, you have to take it one step at a time, like let's be curious, but as a matter of and I was sobbing to, like the whole, like 35 minutes of the energy healing because, well, and it's it's interesting that there was a part of you that was like curious about it I'm not gonna do it.
Speaker 3:Your soul is like, oh like. Your ego may have judgments about this, but I know what's good for you.
Jennifer Walter:Let's try it yeah, my telltale sign is is curiosity whenever I feel curious with people every single day.
Elise Enriquez :Intuition it's yeah and I'm. That's one of the telltale signs, whatever your four steps ahead okay, like there's something to learn like yeah, absolutely, that's beautiful, that's beautiful I saw you progress on this thing. What is, and we'll just say what kind of?
Jennifer Walter:practices or rituals have you found?
Elise Enriquez :I saw you making your shadow work. Start the podcast. What would it actually?
Speaker 3:so there's a point where what could the shadow work and shadow work is no longer necessary. Like you can't stay doing shadow work forever, it's just the entry point.
Elise Enriquez :So it's the entry point.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Jennifer Walter:And that's something I love Well it's not just me, I take my clients through it too, because we can get stuck.
Speaker 3:There's some coaches that only do shadow work, and it's like you're in the dark place for a long freaking time and I got taught there too and you're not creating anything new. You need to create something new. You need to create new experiences. You know, maybe new salary, you become an effortless manifester, but you have to go to the other side, so I don't really have rituals anymore, but what I would recommend for people that are just beginning to do shadow work is.
Speaker 3:the curiosity angle, Jennifer, you hit it right on the nose is to look at all of the disturbances that come up for us or the conflicts that come up for us or things that rub us the wrong way or have this emotional charge. Just look at it with curiosity and be like why does this bother me so much? What, what is?
Elise Enriquez :because that's your ego defending the bothering, but you think it might go this way.
Speaker 3:Your ego is like the defense shoots up with the other person and so often I ask my clients like, what emotion is this evoking out of you? And they'll say, you know, grief or anger, whatever comes up. And I say, well, what is that defending?
Elise Enriquez :But just worry about the next. Thing.
Speaker 3:What is that anger defending, yeah, what is that emotion?
Jennifer Walter:defending oh, that's a beautiful question.
Elise Enriquez :You are, so you just got to try one and see what happens, because it's just your defense mechanism coming into place.
Speaker 3:That's the bouncer at the door saying nope, we don't want to go here. And so like I get excited.
Speaker 3:I get like when I trigger people, or if people trigger me, I'm like all right, we're getting to the goals, like I get excited because I know that's pointing to something in the unconscious, and so that's where the gold is, because the more you release that energy, the more the iceberg comes above water, the more free you become to create your desires that are aligned with your soul, not your ego, not your conditioning, not your fear, not the past, not what your parents told you, what you should be doing or who you should be or who you thought you know in a survival mode. You free yourself from survival mode so you can thrive I don't know.
Jennifer Walter:Keanu reeves.
Elise Enriquez :Oh that's beautiful researching microphones, that feels like a very you know, like he walks in and ends this podcast, but I have this very strong urge and you know, I know shadi will tell me now go with your urge.
Jennifer Walter:I want to tell you about my weird dream. Do you want to hear it?
Speaker 3:Let's do it. So I was going to say another way to the triggers and how you judge people are two ways to assess what's in your unconscious. But dreams yes, dreams are also telling us what is in our unconscious mind.
Jennifer Walter:Okay, okay.
Speaker 3:Tell me what's in my unconscious mind.
Jennifer Walter:Okay. So like okay, I'm way too excited for this. The dream was weird, but you're gonna love this, okay, so you still need to get things out of your head in some way, shape or form.
Jennifer Walter:So get it out of your head and onto paper and an apartment you can engage with it and it kind of looked like an old apartment my partner and I used to live in, but not very specific, and there was like a very big spider, very big scary spiders. I'm not usually scared of spiders, but that one was too big so I asked my partner to to help me, like get it out and then he kind of like got it out, um, and I was going into one room and closed the door and then he's like, okay, you can come out, like the spider got into five.
Elise Enriquez :It's like okay, you can come out, the spider got into.
Jennifer Walter:It looked like a raft of dried flowers, very beautiful. I kind of went into that and then he was trying to shake the spider out of that raft.
Elise Enriquez :It wasn't make dentist appointment.
Jennifer Walter:I didn't have a dentist to call. Instead of a spider, several dead birds fell out and I was like, oh, what are all these dead birds doing on the floor? Where are they coming from? And then I was looking into the wrap of dried flowers and I saw there was a nest inside of the wrap with two little birds and a couple of eggs, like the rooster crowed, and then I woke up.
Speaker 3:Oh, that's very interesting it was weird so did you.
Speaker 3:So you said the spider, um, crawled into the, the wreath of flowers, yes, yes, and you followed the spider there and that's what you saw. Okay, so the spider represents the dark, divine feminine. So it is, it is the ultimate. So, if you think of feminine, the when I say feminine, by the way, I don't mean, um, gender, okay, yeah, it's an energetic property, so, and it exists in all of us. It's, it's yin, right? So it's the yin energy in us, and this is in ancient philosophies, ancient cultures as well, as we all have inner feminine, we all have inner masculine, but if we are born as women, then we may, or actually any gender. If we're born as any gender, we may choose to be more of one than another and we repress the other. So this divine feminine energy, it's mother earth. Mother earth is both creative and destructive. Okay, so the divine feminine has the power to destroy, and destroy things that are no longer useful, or the past paradigms or, in this case, our conditioning, that we're purging, we're releasing um, you know, even in indigent cultures, they believed, any time nature, a mother earth, would show up with hurricanes, destructive tornadoes, it's like, oh, earth is cleansing itself. It's a purification process, okay. So that's what a spider represents it's the ultimate destroyer, but also the creator. So we have that power within us, okay.
Speaker 3:So here's one trick, two tricks actually. First trick is that I would recommend for you and for anyone else is write down your dreams. So have a journal by your bed and a pen, even if you're like, oh, I never dream, I never remember my dreams. You dream every night. We have about three to six dreams every night, and if you set the intention to remember your dreams, you're going to remember them. And as soon as you wake up, write down the symbols, write down what happened, like you just told me, write down the emotions that's really important the feeling that you had, and even if you don't know what it meant, even if it sounds crazy and you're like I don't know how to decipher this, just writing it down is bringing the iceberg above water. It is entering into your awareness, okay, and your mind it's starting to shift things. All right, you're unconscious. The iceberg is like kind of moving, it's bobbling up, right. So that was the one trick.
Speaker 3:Next trick is that everything in our dream is reflecting an aspect of ourselves. So the spider represents the dark, divine, feminine, so it is the shadow side of our femininity, it is the part of ourselves that we repress and it's guiding you to this wreath of flowers. Flowers is abundance, it's joy, it's beauty, right, it's transformation. It's your true self. And the dying birds. Birds are associated with um spirituality. So if they're dying, if they dropped, so it's there's sort of a death of the old paradigm, our old beliefs and our old perceptions, like what I was telling you, that I went through right about my perceptions of religion and god and spirituality. It's like that kind of had to fall away.
Jennifer Walter:It feels like room for something new, for a new parting and for a new way of believing and in the sense of death, it feels like death.
Speaker 3:It's not a real death, it's not like that part of you is dying, it's just that the ego is like. But these beliefs that we have is what has kept us alive. I don't want to let it go. Yeah, it's clinky, it's the way it's ushering out. So, to me, what you saw in the spider is uncovering the dark side. Dark side, it's not really dark, but the hidden aspects of your feminine nature, your self, your shadow, is going to guide you to transforming your perspective of spirituality and creating something new, birthing something new. Two eggs eggs is birth, eggs is birth of something new. Right, you said the fact that it was two, it wasn't just one.
Jennifer Walter:No, it was at least two eggs.
Speaker 3:Yeah, no-transcript even if it doesn't make sense, um that's a good tip.
Jennifer Walter:Yes, yeah, always keep the little notepad.
Speaker 3:Okay, so do you have more questions?
Jennifer Walter:no, yeah, like my mind is my mind is spinning in a lot of different places and I'm like, oh, okay, we're gonna bring shadi back on for another episode sometime and I'm still a lot yeah, it is a lot um, and this is all fair.
Jennifer Walter:So if you're still following us, like give yourself a clap on the back for this, because it was a lot, and I'm still hung up on the. What you said on the perception of the physical world is dictated by our relationship with our mother and I'm like, but I have so many questions around, like how we see money in our relationship to our mother. But we're gonna do, we're gonna talk about money another time, because I feel that's a whole. That's a whole conversation on its own.
Jennifer Walter:Yeah, um, yeah. But for anyone who cannot wait until uh, I bring Shadi back on the podcast. Where can they find you online? Where you hang out?
Speaker 3:so, uh well, I'm going to be starting my own podcast.
Jennifer Walter:Uh, heads up you know, yeah, and it's going to be called this life fulfilled.
Speaker 3:So that is my handle, that is my instagram handle. You can find me on instagram this life fulfilled and um. I am actually offering for your listeners only exclusively whoever um. First of all, I give um complimentary shadow sessions. So the first session with me. If you want to know what's keeping you stuck, if you want to know why you keep creating the same situations, if you feel like you're groundhogs day you know this circular thing constantly, you just can't get out of it, you're trapped I offer complimentary shadow session. We can find out what is keeping you from the ultimate soul level, relationship or career, whatever it is. And whoever among your listeners signs up through my link I think I sent the link to you so you can share it.
Jennifer Walter:We'll shortly link it in the show notes.
Speaker 3:Yes, thank you. If you schedule a session with me, a shadow work session with me, I'm going to send you a free meditation slash visualization on releasing your fear to get unstuck.
Jennifer Walter:Oh, that's beautiful Good stuck. Oh, it's beautiful good. Okay, this, this sounds.
Speaker 3:Thank you so much for being so generous and this sounds so good. I might snag it up myself, but absolutely yeah, I feel like there's some more work here to do with the spider. The spider is leading you there, so you want to pull at it and go under with the or who would you say that? Who was the name of the guy Karan?
Jennifer Walter:Karan yeah. I'll see if he, if he, guides me over the river yeah, of course he will. That's your destiny that is very true. It will all unfold how it's supposed to be yep, yep, in its own time. And that's okay, yeah, exactly so, shadi. Before I let you go, I always have one last question what book are you currently reading? What audio book you're currently listening to?
Speaker 3:Okay, so I'm an Aries. We love to start things and not finish them. So I'm reading three books Is it three? It might be even four. I love it, and I always bounce back and forth, so I depending on my mood, depending on where my head's at. So I'm reading this incredible book that I highly recommend to anyone who's feeling this right now. It's called Dark Nights of the Soul by Thomas Moore. He was a Jungian analyst Finding your way through life's ordeals. So we all experience dark nights of the soul. The dark night is when we hit it. It's because it's signaling us for transformation. Our soul is ready to transform. So I love this book. There's so much gold in this and I'm going to do a podcast episode on this book alone. Another book that I'm reading is called Karma, a Yogi's Guide to Crafting your Destiny, and it's by sad guru, who is a very famous um, I think hindu philosopher oh, that's very good.
Jennifer Walter:I'm also like I also read several books at a time, depending on mood, and sometimes I just really love reading series because then I know what book I'm going to read next. I don't have to do the work of figuring out which book I want to read next, and I've also started collecting the books my awesome guests are reading and they're all on the book recommendation page of the Cinegrad podcast. We're going to link it as well, so it's full library of fiction, non-fiction, all sort of books, um, that my awesome guests are reading. So I'm always kind of like sneaking there for like, oh, what should I read next? Oh, yes, this is speaking to me now a wonderful idea, wow.
Jennifer Walter:Sharing the wisdom of others amazing yeah, and if I don't know if cool people usually in my experience cool people like read cool stuff, so and we've got all we also have like weird medieval romance novels on there which is cool. If that's your jam, then you do you well.
Speaker 3:You know, today, this morning, I heard a britney spears song and I was thinking to myself I still haven't read her book and I want to read it. So I want to hear about her either.
Jennifer Walter:Yeah, I haven't either, and that is very true. Um, I definitely, it's definitely on my biography pile. I must say my, I also like I have a pile of biography books and I still I got, I still only halfway through with the one I started. That was um prince harry's book spare, yes I, that's also.
Speaker 3:I haven't finished it. That's another one.
Jennifer Walter:I started yeah I'm like half I'm somewhere stuck where he was in africa. Yes, me too. I'm like I got enough out of this girl, same I'm like. I cannot bring myself to finish it. And I don't force myself to finish books, because there will be a time and place where I probably pick it up again, but for now I'm good yeah, I mean I'll eventually finish it.
Speaker 3:When I'll see something about Princess Diana and I'll be like, oh, and then I'll like want to finish Harry's book.
Jennifer Walter:Yeah, absolutely Same. We're also going to put Britney's.
Speaker 3:What are you reading right now?
Jennifer Walter:I, oh dear Lord, I have. I started a novel actually just last night and it's called Margot's Got Money Problems. Oh, and I don't Margot's Got.
Speaker 3:Money.
Jennifer Walter:Problems? Oh, and I don't know, I was not. I just started. It's by Rufy Forb and I didn't really expect that. It was about somewhat like a single mother, but hey, that's how it started. So I was immediately hooked, I must say. It started with a penis shaped cake and I'm like this is very weird. And the lady who baked the cake for Margot even built in like a like a cream slash sperm pump into the penis cake. So I was immediately like okay, this book is so weird and fantastic I'm gonna keep on reading.
Speaker 3:I think, yeah, it sounds like it's meant to kind of have some humor in your life. I think inject some yeah, absolutely so.
Jennifer Walter:Margo's got money troubles by Rufy Ford Shadi. Thank you so so much for sharing your wisdom with us on the scenic route podcast. It was an absolute pleasure to have you.
Speaker 3:Oh, it was a pleasure to be here. You are such a enlightened soul yourself, jennifer. You have so much wisdom, and it's an honor really to to share this show with you today. Thank you.
Jennifer Walter:And just like that, we've reached the end of another journey together on the Scenic Root Podcast. Thank you for spending time with us. Curious for more stories or in search of the resources mentioned in today's episode, visit us at scenicrootpodcastcom for everything you need and if you're ready to embrace your scenic root, I've got something special for you. Step off the beaten path with my Scenic Root Affirmation Card Deck. It's crafted for those moments when you're seeking courage, yearning to trust your inner voice and eager to carve out a path authentically, unmistakably yours. Pick your Scenic Route Affirmation today and let it support you. Excited about where your journey might lead? I certainly am. Remember, the Scenic Route is not just about the destination, but the experiences, learnings and joy we discover along the way. Thank you for being here and I look forward to seeing you on the scenic route again.
